Juhl: I brought my tween to Osheaga and this is how it went down (2024)

I did not anticipate the giant bunnies. The screaming crowd, though — they anticipated the giant bunnies. But that came later.

We’d arrived at Osheaga in the early afternoon on Friday — two moms, a ruthless heat wave and the biggest preteen Melanie Martinez fans in Parc Jean-Drapeau: my kid Jillian and her friend Hayden.

American singer-songwriter Martinez’s fans weren’t hard to pick out in the crowd. They were bathed in pink and sparkles and there were stars and hearts twisted into their hair. They nodded at each other as their paths crossed and they were generous when the girls stopped to compliment their outfits, even though most were one generation older — Melanialls, one imagines.

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We weren’t seeing a lot of other tweens on site, though we did come across Osheaga veterans Stevie, 3, and Asher, 5, playing cornhole with their parents, Rhonda and Megan Quinn. It was the kids’ second time attending the festival, where their favourite things are the ice cream, food, misting stations and “they dance a bit.”

It’s no mean feat to dance in an August heat wave, but let me tell you, it sure feels good when a breeze off the river cools the layer of sweat covering your entire person. Heat be damned, the goal was to squeeze as much out of the festival as possible before securing a good spot for the Martinez set.

The day wasn’t going to be flawless. I left my wallet at home and had to use my Costco card as ID.

“There’s no shame in it,” the welcoming staff member told me. “When my mom sends me to Costco, I’m all in.”

Less than half an hour later, the dramatic, heavy black eyeliner wings Jillian had crafted melted down my eyelashes toward my cheeks. “It’s emo,” she assured me.

And despite following the Three Rules of Osheaga — hydrate, hydrate, hydrate — I eventually succumbed to heat exhaustion and had to find one of the misting stations Asher and Stevie were so fond of.

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We fell into a rhythm: walk, eat, walk, sit, walk — oh, Ferris wheel. There, up at the top, is where the good breeze had been hiding all along.

It was the last chill breath of air we’d get before arriving at the main stage, a maze of fans sporting high tops or cowboy boots, glitter and good cheer. That’s where the rest of the tweens and teens were found. Throngs of them. Vibrating with excitement. The elder Melanialls — and one awesome dad — made space for them.

I was less than an hour away from another bout of heat exhaustion when the giant bunnies appeared. There was a moment I assumed they were some sort of heat dream or mirage. The kids recognized them, though: They were the Bunny Doctors, characters with rabbit heads and human bodies that were created by Martinez during her Cry Baby era.

The bunnies were welcomed with shrieks of joy and then screams of excitement when Martinez, draped in purple and frills, joined them onstage. Martinez is a storyteller. With each album, she reinvents herself and surrounds herself with a fanciful cast of characters that clearly resonate with young women and girls. Bunnies, creepy dolls, cradles and dollhouses — and fireworks to top it all off.

“It was really hot,” one of the girls conceded. “But it was worth it. It was so worth it.”

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hjuhl@postmedia.com

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